i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
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She cheated on me with the same state trooper that wrote me a ticket.
I guess now you have a way to keep your license when you bring that up in court.
Dude, you are the most awesome.
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
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And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
I told my coworker that I'd get him some edibles because he wants to rekindle his marriage. I'd better get some good karma out of this.
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
Drunk is a universal language darling
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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