too bad you live with your parents still
Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
of course. lets lasso hookers.
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
Randomize
