the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
New game I thought of while bored on the train. Anytime I get a text from an ex, I will randomly text a different ex. It's like a less charitable version of pay it forward.
You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe.
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
Anyone would get lost in that field after that much vodka. Trust me... I kind of feel like superman considering I even made it home. Most people would've been face down in a random oilfield. Not this guy.
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
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