ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
He started screaming "fuck me I'm Ryan Gosling" and proceeded to pick up the smallest guy at the party and carry him to bed.
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
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