I'm laying in your front yard are you home
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
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