I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
I think my greatest accomplishment today was probably using a bottle opener to get the cap off my fourth drink while holding the cat WITHOUT dropping him.
Oh god, what has my life become?
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
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