Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
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