It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
Well the nurse forgot to take all my stitches out, so my surgical tools are peroxide, kitchen scissors, fingernail clippers, a pocket knife, and 11 beers. Let's do this...
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
Randomize
