Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
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