I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You tried to tell her that the salad was an afrodisiac then proceeded to stroke yourself with the feather duster
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
The best thing about my promotion is that I now have an office with a door. I can take my naps in peace instead of leaning my head against the stall in the bathroom.
I can't believe they pay you six figures. I hate you.
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
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