Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
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