Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
My phone just autocorrected 'vagina' to 'vaginihilation'...when exactly did I need to convey total annihilation by lady parts??
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
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