try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
Randomize
