i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
Never joke about your clitoris.
Randomize
