Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
Best friends brother. Beat that.
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
I know that was a dream because I woke up and there was no pizza
The hookers weren't a dream get tested
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
Randomize
