Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
Since you haven't talked to me since the rancid whipped cream fiasco, I'm going to assume we are no longer hooking up. But I need my handcuffs back. ASAP.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
Randomize