they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
just when i thought things couldnt get worse, the batteries died in my vibrator.
Did you just see the Batmobile???
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
