she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
So much rum. So many feels.
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
I'm going to start using the hurricane naming system for my hangovers. Hangover Agatha is a real bitch today.
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
Randomize
