i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
Randomize