8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
I can't remember if the bartender cut you off after you broke your glass or after you wished the bar a happy winter solstice during your karaoke number.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
Like how hard is it to come up to me with chocolate and wine and say "hey, you're beautiful. Wanna marathon Doctor Who in sweatpants?" Hell yes!
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
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