i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
i will replace your cream cheese. there's enough for breakfast. you are my friend. i had guests we wanted bagels so bad im sorry. i left you notes. i love you. you have enough for a bagel or two and i will get you more. you are so pretty.
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
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