She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
People...there is no better feeling in the world than finding out via Google that your ex has a warrant out for his arrest. No better feeling.
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
you woke me up at 1am last night high on cough syrup to tell me jay z was an idiot for cheating on beyonce
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
Randomize
