So I thought I was slick leaving his room this morning all incognito. Little did I know I was wearing his football jersey with his name across the back... stilettos & my bra was left behind. never seeing that again
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
Come back. Shots need mouths.
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
You were sober bartending last night right?
Sorta. I remember you crying, ripping rose petals off the flower stem and slowly sprinkling them behind the bar at me and singing softly
Romantic
Randomize
