PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
I just wanted to give you a heads up. There's a crab in the kitchen. He doesn't have a name yet. We are just calling him crab for now. Oh! and we have memosas!
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
Randomize
