Dude, you need to talk to your mom
wtf?
She just called and asked if i would be part of the intervention she's planning for you
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
On a side note...my DUI lawyer just snapchatted me. This is the exact moment in time when I realized my like IS a joke.
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
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