We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
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