eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
I'm thankful I didn't get drunk and shit my pants this year. 🦃
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
Randomize
