my drunk step mom just informed me my dad likes reverse cowgirl. Please god kill me.
it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
Randomize
