one two three fourrrrnication!
Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
I making dinner, so you might want to actually come home tonight.
oh, you finally did the dishes then?
No, bought new ones.
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
