Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
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