wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
this wart on my finger ripped off while i was fingering this girl the other night. she thought she had gotten her period and started crying so i went with. its better for both of us that way
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
All she gave me for breakfast was raw toast. How can she expect me to eat raw toast?
You mean bread?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
I hope in my next life I'm a sterile trophy wife. With a husband who showers me in wealth and gifts but can't get a hard on. Do you think my karma is good enough for that?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
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