and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
The awkward moment when you're leaving the most attractive guy you've ever been with and you're trying not to shit on yourself. Fucking welcome to my life
Randomize
