I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
giving a 30 min presentation still drunk is like giving birth, upside down in a pit of snakes while being on fire.
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
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