The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
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