My hair reeks of homosexuality.
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
Randomize
