..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
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