Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
Randomize