So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
My vagina just recognized that song.
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
Is there a non-awkward way to tell a girl I work with that she looks just like my favourite pornstar?
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Randomize
