I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
I told the emergency room nurse I didn't want to stop and ruin the moment. She said safewords are there for a reason. Super condescending. Got her number though.
Turns out it's a fake number.
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize
