Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
Took out half a tooth with a handle of jim beam last night. Apparently I can't walk and chug bourbon at the same time
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.