Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
Randomize