'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
I'm drinking straight vodka and railing lines of adderall while writing a paper about the nature of Jesus. It's 6:50 in the morning. College.
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
Why are your pants in the freezer?
Apparently I thanked the paramedics over and over again for saving the "happy new year" beads that I was wearing
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
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