Multitasking record: pooping whilst putting on shoes and cleaning ear with q-tip. All while texting.
Update: fell off toilet, one shoe on, q-tip still in ear. Not a pro.
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
two words: eviction party
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
Just served breakfast to a bunch of hella drunk kids. They kidnapped the birthday boy for his 21st and he was wearing a disney onesy and bunny ears. They've been drinking since before dawn, why don't we have friends like that?
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
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