every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
I'm going to write a new song and call it "Did I wax my vagina for this?" remind me to never go across the country for a penis ever again.
May the power of my ass compel you!!
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Randomize
