paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
Teaching my class, used paper clips to fix my hair. Too hungover to be a kindergarten teacher.
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
wow bdsm is so cute
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
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