AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
she told me i tasted like america
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
She sprinted out of the bathroom and ran all the way into the middle of the street. Five minutes later she came back with a banana nut muffin. She's that kind of drunk.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
Randomize
