Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
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