idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
just got back. in my inebriated state i broke an ugly lamp and was sent to the store (still drunk) to get a new one. just spent last half hour in isle 3 of dollar general surounded by more ugly lamps and trying not to throw up on each and every single one.
Randomize
