Whod you bang
no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
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