i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
so I got guilt tripped into giving her a new years kiss, and she proceeded to try and eat my face while mounting me. when you give a mouse a cookie...
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
Why didn't you ever bring me to the pope as a baby so he could kiss me.
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
Randomize
